To Remember You

September 26th,
Six years ago you're gone to your forever peace place that Allah designed it to you. We have a good times, eight weeks too fast I guess. I never thought it's going to last forever, I mean us. You are not leaving forever, you just gone to some kind of place we called as heaven. I believe you are even here right next to me. Just for let you know, I moved to a new home it's not far from my old place but you still can drop me on that place you dropped me at September 12nd.
I didn't have any beautiful words for this, you know all I ever wanted is to see you again. I can't find your photographs because Friendster is no longer social media, now they switched it to online games.
I think I miss you, and I was wondering why didn't you come over to my dream just to say 'hey, how are you doing' or 'hey, I miss you too'. I'm sorry I can't find your family contacts, your sister's number is deleted from my phone book when I lost my cellphone. I didn't have the chance to come to your home to pray for you as well or come to your grave. I've heard it's sooo far and untraceble remember we were just boyfriend-girlfriend and your family barely knows me, even your sister does a bit. I don't know what to say, I don't know. I hope you'll be able to read this over your place. I hope Allah will let you to open my blog for five minutes. To be honest, I don't think if you are still here now we will be still together as well. You were off to college already I guess and life changed. I don't think you can still stand for my ego to wins every time because of nothing against you 
I love you. What else could I say? Where were you these past years? Don't you miss me? I miss you.

Now, I'm 20. And I still the same girl you left that day without any messages or calls to say goodbye in any ways, I still the same girl you loved on Friendster, I still the same girl who forced you to do something you don't like just to be silly, I still the same girl without you. Now I have a boyfriend I have been dating with him for almost four years. He never likes when I told him about you or when I asked him to drive me to your grave. I guess I know how he felt about you. I guess he was jealous. You are now gone and I still remembered you. I don't know why I still do I just want to do because I want to. I've been lookin' up for your sister number and I don't who to ask. We might be apart, and you might dating other girls up there, but it's okay. As long as you remember me.

To remember you all I did is remembering you. Picturing your face, how you look, how you do, how you talk, how you walk, how you suddenly want to kiss me during the movie plays and you stop your moves because I was seems way tooooooo nervous, how you mad when I took you nowhere for fun, how you angry whenever you got me drinking during fasting phase.
And, I am so grateful I was meant to be your girlfriend until your final day. Thank you for making me feels special. Thank you for anything.

I miss you,

Indra Cahya Herwinsa